[3-38] Helping boys build identity and self-worth free from pornography

Porn is a health issue that impacts EVERYONE—women and men, girls, and boys. Still, the statistics are clear that boys consume porn more frequently and earlier than girls. So while we work hard to dispel the myth that “only boys struggle” we certainly don’t want to minimize or dismiss their specific challenges. What do they need? How can we reach them? And how can we help boys build identity and self-worth free from pornography?

In this episode, I talk with Sathiya Sam, the creator of DeepCleanTM, an addiction recovery program for men. Sathiya knows firsthand how early exposure can negatively impact a boy’s sexual development. He was just 11 years old when a friend showed him pornography in the computer lab at their school. We talk about his initial reaction. And how, in the absence of another framework, porn continued to shape his ideas about sex throughout adolescence. 

Boys’ identity and self-worth

Much of teen development has to do with identity formation and programming for sex (hello puberty!). Toxic messaging found in pornography is especially detrimental at this age. For this reason, it’s more important than ever for parents to start conversations about sex early and carefully explain to boys the harms of pornography. 

In this episode:

• Early exposure. How young boys react to pornography. 
• Media influence. Confusing messages targeting boys today. 
• Identity formation. Self-worth grounded in core values.  
• When boys struggle. What does recovery really look like? 

Episode challenge

Look for creative ways to have important conversations with your kids. Sathiya stresses that boys especially put up their guard when spoken to directly (or accusingly) about these issues. Plan the conversation combined with a movie, playing sports, or going out for a meal. Anything to take a bit of pressure off. 

Download our FREE guide

Looking for a better way to protect kids from dangerous content online? Help build media resilience with our Quick Guide to Safer Screen Habits. Download your FREE pdf here.  https://bit.ly/Quick-Guide-to-Safer-Screen-Habits

Thanks for listening! If you enjoyed the show, please leave a positive review or tell a friend!

More about today’s guest

Sathiya Sam is a coach and speaker that helps men live with confidence and integrity. A recovered addict himself, Sathiya is the creator of DeepCleanTM – a research-based and Bible-backed system for overcoming porn addiction. DeepCleanTM has helped everyone from college students to medical doctors regain control of their lives and walk in greater levels of freedom. He is married to his lovely wife Shaloma and based out of Toronto, Canada.

Links/Resources

NEW COURSE – Get Off the Fence: Confidently Talk to Your Child or Teen About Pornography

DEEPCLEAN – Website; The New Man Podcast; Facebook; Instagram

FORTIFY – Is your teen struggling with pornography? Click here to check out Fortify – FREE for youth!

BARK – Want help monitoring your kids’ apps and social media? Click here for a FREE 30-day trial of the Bark App or download it at the app store and use our promo code: MEDIASAVVY

COVENANT EYES – Need great filtering software for your internet and devices? Click here to check out Covenant Eyes.

*Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means, at no additional cost to you, Parents Aware/Media Savvy Moms receives a commission if you click through and make a purchase. Thanks for helping to support us in our mission to protect families from the harms of pornography.

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Media Savvy Moms Podcast

Who knew honest conversations about parenting and pornography could be so approachable? Join Marilyn for a series of contemplations, chats, and interviews as she helps fellow parents tackle this challenging topic with their kids.

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