Who has time for self-care when their child is struggling? As moms, we tend to put everyone else first, neglecting our own well-being. We take on guilt and lose our individuality. We assume we’ll have time to take care of ourselves after the crisis has passed. But while we’re frantically patching up the problems on the outside, our insides are deteriorating.
In this episode, Barb Winters of hopefulmom.net joins Marilyn to talk about the importance of self-care, especially when our child is in a crisis. A few months after Barb learned of her son’s struggle with porn, she realized she was grieving the loss of the son she thought she knew, and she heeded the advice she had given so many other women. Take time to mourn the loss and heal. We are more effective when we parent our children from a place of wholeness.
Importance of Self-Care
Our bodies are like machines. When one area of life is unhealthy, it affects the other areas of life. They are interconnected and dependent on each other. We explore some of these areas and the importance of self-care in each.
In this episode:
- Physical Self-Care. All of us experienced a loss in 2020. And maybe, like Marilyn, your physical self-care suffered. We know it’s important to eat well, get proper sleep, and exercise, but how do we make sure it’s happening during a pandemic or when a child is in crisis? We have a few hacks that may be helpful.
- Spiritual Self-Care. How do we cut through the noise of life on a daily basis for inspiration to be the best we can be? The answer differs for each of us, but it’s important to look up from our to-do lists and nourish our souls. We offer a few thoughts and suggestions.
- Social Self-Care. Maybe, like Barb, you’ve felt alone in your parenting endeavors and you need someone to tell you you aren’t crazy. We encourage you to find a confidante, as well as a community of like-minded people, a place where you care and share each other’s burdens. That’s why we began ParentsAware/Media Savvy Moms and hopefulmom.net.
- Have Fun! Social self-care also includes socially connecting with others, like a spouse or girlfriends, for some joyful moments. It’s healing to lay our worries aside and choose joy and fun. We recommend a few ways to connect with your child apart from the struggle.
Episode challenge
Take an inventory. Look at each area of life (physical, spiritual, emotional, intellectual, and social) and evaluate how you are doing in each area using a scale of 1-10. Then pick one or two areas and set a few short-term goals and a few long-term goals in those areas. It’s never too late to start taking care of yourself. We’re better parents when we understand the importance of self-care and when we’re functioning well in all areas of our life.
Digital course COMING SOON!
Ready to start the conversation but wondering how to find the right words? Our brand new course, Get Off the Fence: Moving from stuck to confidently talking to your child or teen about pornography, is entirely customizable to your family’s needs. Sign up here to be the first to know when it is available.
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Links/Resources
Ep. #1-3, Put Your Oxygen Mask On First: Taking Time for Self-Care When Your Kids Have Porn Problems
Related Article: My Child Needs Help! 6 Practical Ways to Put Your Oxygen Mask on First
Ep. #2-18, Kids, Screens & Mom Guilt with Vauna Davis, Life Coach
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