Dear Savvy: How do I deal with online safety and playdates?

Just when we thought we had online safety figured out … time for a playdate! When our kids are away, will they still be safe? How do we bring up our concerns about online safety and playdates with the other parents? 

This episode is part of our #DearSavvy series. Sometimes you just want a quick answer to a burning question. These shorter episodes are designed to give you just that. Tune in to the podcast to hear the whole scoop, and check out the show notes for helpful tools and information. If you’d like to submit a question, click here to Contact Us. 

Dear Savvy: What about when my kids go on playdates? How can I talk with other parents about my concerns regarding online safety without offending them?

Dear Listener,

We know it can feel intimidating to approach other parents about online safety. We worry they might feel attacked, or that we don’t approve of the safeguards they have in place for their own children. But in this case, communication is key. You never know. The other parent might actually be relieved that you brought up the topic. 

We don’t hesitate to lay down the law when it comes to our kids’ physical safety on playdates. We expect other parents to keep them from running in the street or burning themselves on the stove. Why do we hesitate when it comes to online safety?

Here is what Melody and Marilyn discussed on the podcast today:

• Times are different from when we were kids. Media challenges are ever-present. Our conversations with other parents need to change with the times to include online safety.
• Kids aren’t necessarily looking for trouble online. Often, inappropriate content creeps in by accident. (Think, autoplay on YouTube, or music streaming on a device.) Find out what devices kids have access to when they are at friends’ houses and where. 
• Be bold. Say something like “I’m not comfortable letting my kid have unsupervised access to the Internet. How do you feel about that?” Our experience is that parents react really well when we bring up the topic of online safety.
• Be PROACTIVE rather than REACTIVE. It’s a lot easier to talk to other parents about online safety before something bad has happened on a playdate.

For more information…

To help you prepare to deal with online safety and playdates you’ll want to read, Proactive Parenting: Teaching Young Children Resilience Against Pornography. This foundational blog post is based on an interview Marilyn had with a young mom who began talking to her kids about porn at an early age. 

We’re referring you to this article to help reinforce our layered approach to this issue. Communication is so important! When our kids are going to play at someone else’s house, we need to be sure we have clear expectations about online safety on two levels:

1. Open communication between parents
2. Open communication with our kids 

Episode challenge

Ask your child what their favorite playdate looks like. Their answers should inform how you’ll want to continue the conversation. Plus, it will help shape the conversation you’re having with other parents. 

Do you have a question for Melody & Marilyn? You can click here to Contact Us, email us at admin@parentsaware.info, or submit your question through any of our social media platforms. We’d love to hear from you!

Links/Resources

Want help monitoring your kids’ apps and social media? Click here for a FREE 30-day trial of the Bark App or download it at the app store and use our promo code: MEDIASAVVY

*Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means, at no additional cost to you, Parents Aware/Media Savvy Moms receives a commission if you click through and make a purchase. Thanks for helping to support us in our mission to protect families from the harms of pornography.

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Media Savvy Moms Podcast

Who knew honest conversations about parenting and pornography could be so approachable? Join Marilyn for a series of contemplations, chats, and interviews as she helps fellow parents tackle this challenging topic with their kids.

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